Hey, Mr. Pants Man, play a song for me!

I almost couldn't believe it when I heard it, but Roy Pearson, the DC administrative law judge who sued a family-owned dry cleaning business a few years back over a lost pair of pants (to the tune of $54 million, I might add!), is trying once again to appeal his overturned case. And his rationale for appealing the case is just laughable.

"This is not about a pair of suit pants," Pearson, representing himself, told a three-judge panel of the D.C. Court of Appeals. The term "satisfaction guaranteed" is "very subjective" and with "no parameters at all," he complained, accusing the cleaners of fraud.

Fraud? That's seriously a stretch to say that a dissatisfied customer is the victim of fraud. Like everyone else in this world, I've already had times where I've been unsatisfied with some service or some store, but having worked in customer service already, I know just how demanding and unreasonable some customers can be. And Mr. Pearson isn't doing the customer any justice (no pun intended) with this venture. My rationale is, if you're unhappy with a service or a store, just don't go back there. There's no need to let your ego get so entangled with your dissatisfaction.

Having said that, I repeat my earlier advice to Mr. Pearson: give it up, dude. You've already made yourself an irreparable laughingstock with this most frivolous of lawsuits, and you've succeeded in taking the Chungs down with you, since they've opted to close down their business. Really, what more do you want?

To paraphrase Steve Buscemi . . . do you see this? It's the world smallest violin playing just for a pair of pants.