Star Trek, if written by Quentin Tarantino

Over the weekend, I watched a few Star Trek: The Next Generation DVDs from Netflix, and it reminded me of something some friends and I did in college—we came up with a list of Star Trek quotes, then edited them Quentin Tarantino-style. For instance:

• Riker, when beating the hell out of a Borg drone: "Does Captain Picard look like a bitch???!!!"
• Picard, naming all of his senior officers for a clandestine, undercover mission: "Number one, you're Mr. Brown. Data, you're Mr. White. Georgi, you're Mr. Blond. Mr. Worf, you're Mr. Pink." Worf, in an angry retort, "Sir, I protest! I am not Mr. Pink!"
• Riker, while talking to Georgi during a shuttlecraft flight: "You know that new McDonald's they opened up on the Klingon home world? Well, they don't call it a royale with cheese there. They call it the kul-pach with cheese."
• Lore, looking down on a Borg drone after Data saves him from assimilation: "I'm gonna get medieval on your positronic ass!"
• Dr. McCoy (from the original series), angrily shouting to Scotty through a communicator, "I'm a doctor, dammit—not an engineer! I fix people, not machines! So pretty please, with sugar on top, beam me the fuck up!"

See what we really learned in college!